Zombies, Adventures, Love?
by Military-SweetHeart
Summary: Tatianna was not your normal teenager living in a world ruled by zombies. For one, she traveled with Columbus and didn't end up killing him. Which was a feat in itself. She enjoyed killing, when the need called, and had a morbid sense of humor. And somehow ended up to fall for a guy almost twice her age. What adventures will she face when traveling with her new found friends?
1. Sniper

_Yeah, yeah, I need to update my other stories. Blah, blah, blah. Don't need the reminder. I will when my writer's block releases me._

_Until then, please enjoy this little story of morbid epicness! XD_

_Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue._

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Chapter One  


"Tatianna! Come one!" Columbus shouted at me, thinking it would make me go any faster. I'm not sure why he was yelling at me, but when I turned around and saw the Cadillac racing towards us, I found my reason. It was pimped up, all Mad Max like and shit. I found myself grinning like a fat kid does when he sees cake. Okay, bad analogy, but it worked. I wanted to keep checking the car out, but Columbus had to be the wimp that he was and drag me backwards. Let's just say, I dragged my feet the entire time, so we didn't get very far when the Caddy pulled in front of us. Columbus grabbed a bike and propped it up, then propped his gun on top. Wimp! I stood off to the side, my hand resting next to my machete.

Don't judge me. I disliked guns because they were loud and tended to fail when you needed them most. Machetes didn't. So back off.

"Tati!" He hissed at me. I shrugged and went to lean against the bike. I wasn't in any mood to deal with Columbus' whining, nor was I in the mood to deal with some guy thinking I was an easy bitch. No sir, fuck with me and I'll fuck you up. "Will you please get behind me?" I shrugged again just as the door opened. First thing I saw was a tall man step out, decked in a leather jacket, jeans, and cowboy boots. Then I saw his face. His skin was lightly tanned and his blond hair was kept to a short buzz cut. He was wearing my favorite kind of sun glasses, Aviators. When he pulled out his mini shot gun and pointed it at Columbus, I knew shit was about to go down. It just depended on who pulled their trigger first.

A few tense seconds passed before Columbus stuck his thumb out in the traditional hitch hiker move. The guy lowered his gun and tossed his glasses into the car. He nodded. I waited for Columbus to get his shit and lead the way. Then the guy noticed me. He tipped his hat in my direction and gave me a small smile. How I hadn't noticed his hat is beyond me. I smiled back.

I threw my duffel bag into the back before I got in, noticing the man's things laying on the seat next to me. Being polite and all that, I pushed my stuff to the floor. Hey, it was his car. No way was I gonna be rude and bitchy. Columbus was another story.

"So, uh, what's your name?" I kinda tuned Columbus out after that, only tuning back in when the guy, Tallahassee, asked for my name.

"Tatianna. And no, it's not a city or town. It's my real name," I explained before Columbus could. He had a habit of trailing off topic and messing facts up. Tallahassee gave me a funny look, so I thought of going into a little more detail. "I'm from Colorado Springs. Thought it was too long a name. Besides, I like my real name, so why bother changing it?"

"Tati," Columbus warned. I shot him a cold glare which shut him up quickly. Just cause he was older then me did not make him the boss of me. After being offered a shot of whiskey, and declining, I felt like I was being studied.

"You one of those softies? Can't handle a little liquor?" Tallahassee questioned. I laughed at his harsh tone.

"Nah, it's just that I promised my mother two things. I wouldn't drink till I was 21, and my first drink would be with her. Seeing as how the second promise is void now, I figured I keep the first one. If only to honor her." When I was done I leaned into the seat, mood dropping till it was all the way down. Any talk about my family made my mood turn for the worse, and usually it would last for awhile. Tallahassee somehow sensed this shift and gave me a sad look.

"Oh Tati," Columbus started, but ended when he noticed I was somewhat gone. When Tallahassee asked where we were headed to, I decided to quit my pity party of one.

"Denver. He's heading for Columbus. You?"

"Tallahassee."

"Well, all three of those are East, so-" Columbus was quickly interrupted with a steady glare.

"Whoa now. I'll give this little adventure till about Texarkana," Tallahassee stated. It didn't really matter to me. I would be getting off as soon as possible, or until we landed in Colorado. Either way, I wasn't concerned.

"Suits me. I'll be gone way before then." I muttered. Columbus gave me the sad puppy dog look which always had a way of making me feel like shit. I reached forward and patted his arm. "Don't worry Columbus, I'll probably head your way if I don't find what I'm looking for." That seemed to have brighten his mood, even if for a little. I hated lying to him, but once I'm gone, I'm gone. I'll probably never see these two again.

"Don't you, uh, wanna buckle up? You know, safety first?"

"I can already tell you're gonna get on my nerves." I let out a bark of laughter, if only he knew.

XXX

"So, Tatianna, huh?" Tallahassee asked while we waited for Columbus to finish his...business. I nodded, not sure where he was heading with this. "Pretty name..." He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck.

We had been traveling with him for about two days, and already he had grown on me. He reminded me of my dad, in a weird way.

I turned to look at him, being in the passenger seat and all. I had made Columbus give it to me after Tallahassee had threatened to make him zombie bait. He had been going off about his stupid rules and had apparently shortened Tallahassee's patience to the bare minimum. Now looking at him, I could tell he wanted to ask me something, but didn't know how to put it in words. Finally, after a few tense seconds, he let out a breath and asked what was bugging him.

"How old are ya?" I bit the inside of my cheek, trying to stop my laughter. So that's what was bugging him.

"17. I'll be 18 in October. You?"

"35."

I let out a whistle, giving him my signature lopsided smile. He returned it. Then we both started laughing like someone had told us a joke. Once we stopped, he gave my hand a soft pat and we fell into a comfortable silence.

Which was soon broken when Columbus stumbled back towards us, a few zombies following him. I groaned, not again. Anytime this little bitch went to the bathroom, he always managed to have zombies following him! It's like the zombies had a radar that went off every time he had to go, or something! He jumped into the car and Tallahassee took off. He handed me a sniper rifle, the only gun I ever liked, and gave me a look. I rolled the window down and leaned out, aiming for the zombies in front. Letting off two quick rounds and dropping two meat sacks, I was beginning to feel that familiar feeling. The one where the world melts away and it's only me, the rifle, and the zombies. Columbus had seen me like this before. Where I was completely calm and enjoyed killing. He knew to never get in my way when I was like this. After dropping another five zombies, we had made it out of the small town and were safe momentarily.

I got back into my seat and handed Columbus the gun. He took it without question. Tallahassee just drove in silence, but gave me a weird look every few minutes.

"Where'd ya learn to shoot like that?" He finally asked.

"Well, my dad was a sniper. So, I guess I learned it from him." I chuckled out. Awkward silence broken, Tallahassee chuckled deeply.

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_Well, review!  
_


	2. Banjo Slaying

_Yeah, yeah, I need to update my other stories. Blah, blah, blah. Don't need the reminder. I will when my writer's block releases me._

_Until then, please enjoy this little story of morbid epicness! XD_

_Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue._

* * *

Chapter Two  


One thing Columbus and I quickly learned about Tallahassee was that this man loved his twinkies. Like LOVED them. You think I'm kidding, but I'm not.

After that eventful night where I showed my skills, we came across a wrecked hostess truck. Boy, I've never seen Tallahassee move so fast in my life. Before I could blink he was down there with his gun raised, probably praying that there was a twinkie in there. I was just hoping he wouldn't get his face chewed off by a zombie. That would seriously ruin my good mood.

"Oh boy," the minute he opened those doors I knew he was gonna be disappointed. And I was right. There was nothing but those pink, coconut balls in there.

"Mmm, coconut," Columbus muttered before tossing me one. I smacked it away from me. I disliked them for a reason, they were pink. That was it. Its not that pink is a bad color, its just that I hated my food looking pink. Pink cupcakes? Wouldn't eat them. Cake, cookies, donuts? Nope. Not even a bite. Tallahassee thought I hated coconut, so he smiled when he saw me step on one. "You're very violent towards coconut." Columbus stated after taking a big bite of his.

"I love coconut, I just hate eating pink foods."

"Really? Even cotton candy?" Sigh, it's too early in the morning to deal with him. I rolled my eyes and sneered at him.

"If it's pink, then yes, I dislike it." Tallahassee gave me a smirk. I gave him mine. We were in silent agreement that Columbus was an idiot. Finally!

"Well, let's get goin'. I don't want to be out here when the zombies start sniffing around." I quickly turned on my heel, and immediately regretted it. My foot got caught in a small hole and I went backwards. Thankfully, Tallahassee caught me just in time, or otherwise, I would be laying flat on my back with a twisted ankle. Lovely, right? I winced when he set me back on my feet, and hissed in pain when I tried to put weight on it. Without even asking Tallahassee scooped me up bridal style and carried me up the hill towards the car. I tried to hide my blush, but failed miserably.

"I told you to limber up, Tati." I flipped Columbus off. He was really getting on my nerves. After being set down gently, I hopped onto my seat and hesitantly touched my ankle. Seering, red hot, pain made my clench my eyes.

Good news, it wasn't broken. Bad news, I had definitely twisted it. Damn, mother fuckin' hole!

"You alright darlin'? You look ready to pass out," Columbus was about to say something, But Tallahassee gave him a look that said to shut up. He silently asked me if he could look at it and I nodded. I wasn't a doctor, and neither was he, but we both could tell when something was bad just by looking at it. And boy was it bad. Man, why did I have to be so flippin' stupid?! That was Columbus' job!

Sighing in defeat and humiliation, I reached in my bag for some pain killers. Thank God I had cleaned out every medicine cabinet I could before stumbling across Columbus. Because I had a shit load of medicine. Ranging from pain killers to top notch antibiotics. I'm not a prescription druggie, I just like to be prepared for everything and anything. After popping two pills and downing them with a swig of water, I caught the look Tallahassee gave me.

"What?" I asked. By his embarrassed look, I had caught him red-handed. Just wasn't sure in what.

"Nothing. You gonna be able to walk, or run on that?" I nodded. Once the medicine kicked in I would be just dandy fine. Satisfied with my answer, Tallahassee climbed in and started the engine. Columbus was quiet in the passenger's seat. Too quiet.

XXX

I had dozed off for a few hours when I felt the car stop. Sitting up, I brushed my hair out of my face and looked at the windshield. There was a female zombie feasting on some poor dead guy. Columbus and Tallahassee were talking in quiet tones, probably about the zombie. Then we were speeding up. Tallahassee's door opened and slammed into the zombie's face. I started laughing, hard. That let them know I was awake. Columbus shot me a creeped out look which I promptly ignored. Hey, you just have to find humor in life.

"Afternoon sleepin' beauty!" Tallahassee called out. I leaned forward and smiled at him. I was curious about what I missed.

"What did I miss, Prince Charming?" He chuckled at my nickname for him. He should've known better. If he's gonna call me sleeping beauty, then I'm calling him prince charming. Plain and simple.

"Prince Charming, huh? Alright, I could get use to a name like that." I just rolled my eyes in good humor at him. "Not much, just Columbus explaining the other hundred rules to me." I groaned and playfully punched Columbus' arm. He didn't look at that amused. Wonder what had his panties all up in a bunch. Oh well, best to not dwell on the moods of others, as my mother always said. I mentally shook my head, forbidding myself from going down that path. I would not let my good mood be ruined. I stole a glance at Tallahassee from the corner of my eye, and was surprised by the look he gave me. It was a mix of concern and...something else. I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

Yawning, I stretched and laid back down, thinking about getting a couple more hours of sleep before we stopped for the night. I wasn't so lucky. All I got was an hour long cat nap before Tallahassee was shaking my uninjured foot. I sat straight up and gave him a look that spelt death. He ignored it.

"Come one, we're gonna get some food and game." I smiled evilly at the thought of killing some zombies. He shared my grin.

XXX

Columbus quickly learned that Tallahassee and I hated zombies, but for different reasons. Tallahassee, because they stole the life of someone important to him, and me, because they were unnatural. He didn't share our amusement, which suited us just fine. I had taken another tow pills, just in case the first two wore off.

Tallahassee played a couple notes on a banjo and waited. Next thing I saw was a fat zombie jogging towards us. He whacked it and down it went. Never to get back up. While walking the aisles I grabbed whatever caught my eye. Beef jerky, water, candy. Things like that. Even a few apples that hadn't gone bad. That had made me very happy.

"What're you so happy about, darlin'?" I found I liked it when he called me darling. It made me feel warm inside.

"I got some apples!" Was all I said before Columbus came running towards us with another fat one behind him. I swear, that boy just attracts them. Tallahassee tossed me the banjo and once Columbus was clear, I smashed the annoying instrument into the thing's face. And kept smashing it until it was completely destroyed. Yes, I'm violent. But who isn't? "You owe me Columbus." He nodded, just happy to be alive for another day.

We walked towards the back of the store, near the frozen food section. I wasn't really paying attention to what was there. Then all of a sudden, a girl walked out.

"Help me," she muttered.

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_I would love to do what Tati did! I get to take out two things that shouldn't be alive! XD  
_


End file.
